Toilet Paper terrors

Toilet Paper Terrors

Spider for arachnophobia
Nothing to worry about

Have you noticed that a lot of fears that people have are irrational?  Like, I know some people who are incredibly afraid of harmless spiders or bugs.  If one of these people thinks there’s a bug on him or her, the person will start freaking out, sometimes even crying.

Or what about being afraid of sharks when you live hundreds of miles inland?  Or being afraid of public speaking even when you do a good job?
Well, I have an irrational fear that I need to get out there.  Perhaps, by sharing it, I will be better able to find a way to overcome it.
I have an irrational fear of toilet paper.

Toilet paper roll
Fear me.

Now, I don’t fear it when it’s in my home.  It’s not like I sit down in the bathroom, get to the time when I’m supposed to use it and suddenly panic thinking “What do I do now???” or “What if it fights back???”  (I mean, I would fight back if you tried to do that to me.)

I fear toilet paper when I have to buy it in the store.  For some reason, I feel like buying toilet paper is supposed to be an embarrassing experience.  That when I’m walking through the store with toilet paper in my car that someone is going to point at it and shout “YOU USE TOILET PAPER??????!!!!!”
Chef Boyardee mini bites
Mmm-mmm Good!

This doesn’t make any sense of course, since everyone would instantly start judging the guy that called me out (“wait, you don’t?”)  And it’s something that (presumably) everyone buys.  Plus, I think I usually have more embarrassing things in my cart.  Like when I buy 10-15 cans of Chef boy-ar-dee ravioli and pasta shells every time it goes on sale for $1 a can.  The cashier always gets a strange look on his or her face by the time the 8thone goes through.

Anyway, I just thought I would share.  If you think you have a weird irrational fear, email me and I might do a follow-up post, or leave it in the comments below.

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